Boris Badenov

  “Boris Badenov’s past is clouded in mystery, as befits one who insists on top billing as “The World’s Greatest No-goodnick.” Indeed, its even doubtful anyone has seen the real Boris for years and years; for he is such a master of disguise that most government agents are pretty much agreed his regular appearance is merely his prop “villain’s” outfit.
 
A fun-loving youngster, fond of typing cats’ tails to car bumpers, Boris learned his ABCs (Arson, Bomb-throwing, and Conspiracy) in Pottsylvanian public schools before being offered a scoundrelship to U.S.C. (The University of Safe-Cracking). He graduated magna cum louse, mainly on the strength of his heinous contributions of his fraternity’s Hell Week stunts.
 
He operates under various identities [see aliases], such as a pilot named Ace Rickenboris, a pirate called Captain Horatio Hornsoggle, and an Indian water boy named Gunga Drain. However, its fairly certain he was reared in Pottsylvania, a country whose population is made up entirely of spies and secret agents. (the Pottsylvanian “Eavesdropper” is the only newspaper in the world printed in invisible ink.)
 
He has a remarkably strong physique, having survived in only a few weeks’ time being blown up 14 times (12 of them with his own bombs), falling over eight cliffs, and having the following items dropped on his head:

  • Ten flower pots
  • Two boulders
  • One large safe
  • and his partner Natasha.

 Little is known of his relationship with Natasha, but it is assumed to be unsavory.
 
Indeed, it was Boris’ cast-iron stomach that allowed him to live through the infamous Pottsylvania Poison Pickle Purge of 1938, which reduced the ruling clique to only three men — Boris, his Fearless Leader, and the top man on the the top man on the Pottsylvania totem pole, Mr. Big.
 
Boris’ Favorite reading matter is an anthology of fiendish plans called the Fireside Crook Book, and he is a charter member of the Van Gogh Society, a group of Pottsyvanians whose hobby is collecting ears.”
  
–bio from Rocky & Bullwinkle & Friends season 3 brochure. exact words.

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